Don't know how many people realise that today (29th March 2008) between the hours 8pm and 9pm - it's Earth Hour. It's a campaign organised by the World Wildlife Fund and all around the world, we're encouraged to turn off our lights for 1 hour to demonstrate support for action on climate change. You can read more about it on the WWF website (better than me trying to summarise it here) www.wwf.org.uk

So, how many of you will be taking part?

Well, I have heard from him. He emailed to say that if I'd like to stay in contact then he thinks that would be nice as we do have alot in common. He was upfront about saying in terms of progressing things romantically, he thought it was hard to know what made things really click but he wasn't sure if either of us felt that real buzz from each other.

This is what I hate about internet dating and probably will give it up. I'm fairly shy and it takes me a little while to feel comfortable. With internet dating, "decisions" are taken after 1 meeting. Also feel that meeting up with someone from an internet dating site is fairly artificial as there's an underlying pressure that you don't get when 2 people meet in any other social setting. Here you have 2 people meeting, knowing each is looking for a relationship and therefore the date is spent trying to figure out if that person is for you. Maybe I should just learn to relax more!! When I left the restuarant on Friday evening, I admit I didn't feel a "buzz", all I felt was that I liked him, he was really nice and it would be good to meet up again.

So, I replied to him saying that I wasn't sure you could tell from 1 meal whether 2 people "clicked". I said all I knew was we did seem to have a lot in common, that I enjoyed the evening, that I felt relatively relaxed in his company(considering I know I'm shy at first when meeting someone new), and that I would like to meet up again and just see how things went. I added that if at the end I came out with a friend, then I wouldn't feel cheated.

As he may feel differently, I've therefore placed the ball firmly in his court about whether we do end up meeting again. Somehow I'm not feeling very optimistic.

Decided to do a bit of a clear out and came acroos a Kodo CD which has lain hidden from me since I moved into the house. Put it on and was reminded how brilliant they are. Not sure how many people have heard of them but I can honestly say, if you ever get a chance to see them live - grab it!!!

They are a group of Japanese drummers and to see them live is an amazing experience. I was introduced to them (as it were) by an ex who was fascinated by Japan. He took me to see them and I was hooked. The physical strength and exertion it takes is just spellbinding. That's why they are best seen live - it's more than the drumming, it's the whole experience of watching them and being amazed. I therefore try catch them whenever they are on tour in the UK but unfortunately have just missed them.

If you've never heard of them, I've attached a couple of videos I found on YouTube. The quality isn't brilliant, but it'll give you an idea of what they're about:

Sitting on the bed, looking out the window and little flurries of white are falling from the sky! They don't look big enough to settle - don't think it's cold enough either, but it's snow and I am happy!

I guess having been brought up in the warm climate of South Africa, snow is still a novelty for me. It definately brings out the kid in me and I can't wait to wrap up warm and get outside. I love walking outside when it snows. Mad, I know, but who cares!!!!

Have an enjoyable Easter Sunday.

Last night I went out on my 2nd date from the internet dating site. This time, I had a good evening. The company was good, he hadn't lied about his height (!!) and he was better looking than his picture suggested.

In some ways it was a bit strange. At no point did the fact that we had met via the site come up in conversation and at the end of the evening, there was a slight awkwardness - 2 strangers saying goodbye, not knowing what happens next. I had a good evening, I hope he did too. I would like to see him again but I really have no idea whether it is mutual. Don't know whether to be bold and email him to say that I would like to see him again or whether to leave him to contact me. This is why I hate internet dating!!!! I've texted him to thank him for the meal (he paid) and the company. Although he has replied saying he had a good evening, I obviously don't know him well enough to figure out whether he means it or not. I really am getting too old for this!!! Angst when you're younger is so much easier to deal with than as an adult!!!

Annameenamoon nicked this from Landers, and now I'm nicking it too!

1. WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (Mother and Father's middle name)
Monica Briscoe

2. NASCAR NAME: (first name of your mother's dad, father's dad)
(honestly don't know my mother's dad's name!! Father's dad was Colville)

3. STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name)
Clami

4. DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal!
Blue tiger

5. SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
Johannesburg (don't have a middle name)

6. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd fav color, fav drink, add "THE" to the beginning)
The Red Wine (!!!)

7. FLY NAME: (first 2 letters of 1st name, last 3 letters of your last name)
Miark

8. GANGSTA NAME: ( fav ice cream flavor, fav cookie)
Vanilla Shortbread

9. ROCK STAR NAME: (current pets name, current street name).
Oscar Sussex (don't have a current pet but decided to use the cat's name that thinks he lives with me!)

10. STRIPPER NAME: ( name of your fav perfume/cologne, fav candy)
Philosphy Marshmellow

11. PORN NAME: (1st pets name, mothers maiden name)
Sandy Morrick (not very exciting or "porny")

Enjoyed this too - thanks Annameenamoon & Landers.

I do love Tylluanpenry's blogs as there seems to be a lot of synchronicity lately between what's been going on in my head and what she writes. Yesterday was a really positive day for me. I can best describe the feeling as a warm smile radiating out from every part of my body/being. Whatever I looked at and saw, I saw beauty, joy and it all made me feel like smiling even more! At the moment I definately feel like I'm coming to an end of a cycle and about to start a new one. One that is a lot more positive and abundant. I see change as something we all have to go through and we definately shouldn't fear it.

Whilst on the train to work, a song came on my ipod by John Gregory called "Ride of your life" and the words are both beautiful and inspiring. It's about making the most of life. Dreams are all good and well, but you need to reach out to them and make them happen, otherwise they don't get you very far. It is so easy to get into the rut of daily life, to see it as a grind, full of hassle. I know it's not easy, but I resolved that everytime I face hassle, problems, irritations, etc I am going to turn it into a positive. I guess fundementally, part of the reason we are on this earth is to learn and grow.

Today I've already had a lesson! Moonwoman suggested that I think about the job I want, to express it through pictures and each day look at the image and repeat what it is I'm looking for. (That's a summary of what she said, but you get the picture) Well, I took her advise and I've been doing it since the last new moon. Today I went for an interview and they ticked all the boxes. Yahoo! I hear you shout! Well....one thing I didn't make mention was what length of job I'm looking for (interim, perm). I don't mind either however to give up a permanent job for an interim role, the period really needs to be 6months or longer. Living by myself, paying rent and debts, it's too much of a risk to take anything less. Well, my "perfect" job is only offered for a max of 3 months!!!! Don't know whether to laugh or cry.So, I got what I "asked" for, except I forgot to specify one crucial element. My picture is amended and here's hoping......

Anyway, I'm ending this blog with "Ride of your life" by John Gregory. The song has been put to some clips from Narnia which I think just adds to the beauty. Remember life is a ride, enjoy it!!!

On the way home this evening, started wondering whether men and women can ever truly be "just friends"? I have a few male friends, but we didn't start out that way, we were lovers. It's only since the relationships ended that we became friends.

This evening I was invited out for a drink after work by someone I work with. He has been married for over 20 years and their marriage has basically come to an end as a result of them drifting apart. Having never been out socially with a female other than his wife, he was really nervous. I know there was nothing behind the invite out, so I agreed. We had a good evening chatting and as I need to expand my own social circle, have agreed to meet up again. But as said, on the way home, just started to wonder, especially in the beginning, whether men and women can be just friends? I enjoyed his company, but I am not romatically attracted to him.

It's 04:45 on Sunday morning and I've been awake for some time now. Still lying in the dark typing this as it doesn't seem "right" to get out of bed quite yet! I enjoy my bed and sleeping but for whatever reason for the last month or so, I've been waking up around 5am. Not sure why I've woken up so early this morning and why I'm so wide awake. But least I know, being a Sunday, if I do manage to fall back asleep, I am able to snooze late. Do resent waking up really early when I have to go to work. I know that as you get older, the theory is you need less sleep. I'm getting older (aren't we all!) but hope I can go back to sleeping properly.

Strange to be lying here thinking of how many people are still in the land of nod and that there are probably a relatively few people who are having to get up to go to work.

I really do like the stillness of early morning and dawn. Has a different feel to it compared to late evening time. As a child in South Africa, whenever we went on holiday, we'd always be woken really early in the mornings, pile into the car and start our long journey to wherever. As we'd go through towns, I'd be fascinated to see which houses had lights on. And if they did, what they'd be up to. My imagination obviously being limited as I was very, very young!!

Well, I'm starting to yawn, so I'll end my early morning rambling and see if I can get back to sleep.....

Last night I went out on a "date". For some weeks, have been exchanging emails with someone via the online dating site I've joined. As usual (for me) I tend to be attracted to people who live absolute miles away. In this case, he lived in Chester!! Anyway, he had some business down South yesterday so we agreed to meet up for a meal.

I knew from his description that he'd be fairly slim as he is very active sports wise, and that he'd be short'ish - 5'7". Well, if he is 5'7", then I'm a lot taller than the 5'4.5" that I know I am!! This is the 3rd time that I have met up with men who obviously have not told the full truth about their height. I have nothing against short men, but it does throw me when I'm expecting someone to be taller than me and they end up shorter. Decided from now onwards, I'm going to automatically take off 2" from the height indicated in profiles. That way I wont be surprised!

Anyway, in case you're wondering, evening went OK, not too sure I'll hear from him again. Must admit I'm already a bit weary of this dating business - it is hard work!! Although I'm happy with my own company at times, I'm not happy being alone (if that makes sense). Sometimes I wish I could be happy alone and then I wouldn't have to worry about this dating game!

One of my big pet hates is don't tell me you are going to phone me on a certain day, and then don't!! Over the last couple of months, I've been signing on at various recruitment agencies and have gone on a couple of interviews. This is what happened:

1) Went for interview; got told I was the favourite candidate BUT the company had decided since the interviews to tweak the Job Description; said company would want to talk to me when tweaks completed to see if I'd still be interested. Fair enough so far. Agency comes back and Consultant "A" says they'd like me to see on of their new Directors on x date. Fine I say, book annual leave from work and wait for confirmation of time. Silence.... A week before said date, I phone up to find Consultant "A" has gone off on long term sick; with handover with Consultant "B" says nothing about interview. Consultant "B" says she'll phone client and get back to me later that day. Silence.... Next day I phone and message gets passed on (i.e. she doesn't speak to me) to say she's still waiting for client to get back and will call me later that day. Silence.... Two days before said interview date, I phone again. This time get told that client says they didn't tell Consultant A that they wanted to see me again!!! So, why I ask, hasn't she phoned me to tell me this. Because she says she wanted to get Consultant A's side of the story before phoning me which she hasn't yet got!!! I was very good about controlling anger and slamming phone down. I kindly pointed out that with 2 days to the so called interview date, and after numerous promises of "phoning me back", if client didn't want to see me, what Consultant A says is not material, fact is, I don't have an interview and that should have been conveyed earlier.

2) Sign on with new agency. Same day get told about a job and next day told that client wants to see me. Go for interview. Afterwards, Consultant says she'll phone me the following day as her and the client would be talking about the outcomes. I was on holiday on the Friday, so agreed contact would be made the Monday. Silence!!! I emailed on the Thursday to say, do I assume that no news is bad news. No reply. Yesterday evening whilst on the train, I missed a call saying she has "feedback" for me. So, I'm assuming from the message tone that it isn't good news either. But hey...

Now I accept that I feel disappointed about potentially not getting this job and so I'm a bit susceptable to being "annoyed". But it doesn't help when people say they'll phone and then don't. I accept that they may not have any information to give, but believe out of courtesy they should still phone and tell you that. So, if anyone reading is a Recruitment Consultant, please take note!!!

So, on this beautiful Saturday morning I'm sitting here feeling tearful and generally pissed off with life, the universe and everything!!! Yes, the positive side of me is saying, it obviously wasn't meant to be; that the right job is out there and it will come and the right time; that I need to stop trying to control things and just let the Universe do it's thing. But I'm human too, I know for my own sanity I need to change jobs and pretty soon. I can't afford to just resign. Just need to try and stop myself spiralling down.