Yes, I admit it.... I've been glued to the telly watching the rugby world cup. It's almost expected considering I was born and brought up in South Africa. If anyone knows anything about rugby, then you know us southern hemisphere lot take our rugby rather seriously!

I've always had a love/hate relationship with the country of my birth - for a whole load of reasons, some more obvious than others. When asked if I'd ever go back, the answer is very definately NO. My biggest fear whilst growing up was "where will I live?". For as long as I can remember (& I do have a very good memory of my childhood days) I never felt at "home" or that I belonged. As I grew up, I realised my Father was actually British, so at some point, decided it would be to the UK I'd head. Decision was made before I had even set foot on these shores and I never actually remember having a discussion about it with my family. It was just accepted.

Whilst growing up, I hated anything "South African" and when it came to sport, wouldn't support the national side. Now due to the sporting boycott at the time, that wasn't that hard! But when the few rebel tours started to happen, I was one of those who were cheering for the opposition. So, putting my support behind England wasn't that difficult. Ha! That is... unless you are talking about the English rugby side! Just can't do it. Can't support the buggers. It's not that I particularly support South Africa either (although was proud of them on Sunday when they played against Samoa) but it is very much anyone BUT England.

It's almost as if for all that I've "rebelled" against by being a South African, the one thing that managed to ingrain itself into my psyche is a dislike for the England rugby side. Now, having said all this, I'm now paranoid that I've jinxed everyone who plays against England from this point forward and that England will retain the cup! Aaargh!!!!! Please no!!!

I'm not sure I can bring myself to watch the South Africa vs England game on Friday. I'd prefer to take the coward way out and watch only if I knew what the score was. So, to anyone who doesn't want England to win and they do... sorry.... it's my fault for the jinx!

M